I did it, I finally did it! After 15 years – yeah, yeah, I know – I did it! I had a physical on Friday. With Dr. Hussain. No, not Saddam HussEin…Hina HussAin! (BTW, it was the first time I’ve had a physical by a phemale physician…)

You’ve really gotta love a doctor who is (a) a comedian, (b) totally, brutally honest, or (c) all of the above. She did the whole examination thing (“look that way…cough!”) and then when she was giving me her “post-game” wrap-up, she said stuff like “blood pressure, bottom number a little high, heart, OK, etc. etc.” Then this…

But we need to jettison some excess tonnage!

Not “you could stand to lose a couple of pounds.” Not “eat a little healthier.” None of that stuff.

Jettison some excess tonnage!

She’s right, I know. And I got her OK to do the Y thing. And so far it’s paying off…down four pounds since last Monday! But jettison some excess tonnage?

10,000 comdedians out of work, and I get this one…