First, let me say that I was not able to find an old, abandoned, ratty, never-wanted-again rocking chair. I found a brand-new, ratty, why-would-I-want-one rocking chair. But I wasn’t going to spend 80 bucks for it.
Especially since I intended to smash it to smithereens with a sledge hammer in the middle of our morning worship service today.
So I managed to pilfer a rocking chair from our nursery before the service started. A great squeaky, creaky rocking chair. And as it turned out, the fact that our people thought I was about to smash it to smithereens with a sledge hammer was probably more effective than if I had actually done it!
(The talk also included a quote from Shelley Winters about nudity on stage, some condescending quotes about older people from some of our local civic leaders, President Reagan’s diary, Roger Clemens, and a double-dog dare. Who said “traditional” churches aren’t any fun?)